With old age comes wisdom and discounts. Jokes are funny and everyone enjoys laughter, and those seem like good reasons to present you with some great one-liners. "What is worse than ants in your pants? Read below for inspirational and heartwarming quotes about what it truly means to grow older: In addition to the thought-provoking quotes above, there are many slogans, proverbs, and folk sayings that offer some grains of wisdom and cheer. Quotlr helps you to improve your life, to achieve inner peace and happiness by reading motivational quotes. One more time, sweetness. The perfect description of a bowling game is one where there is plenty of room at the top, but no room to lie down. Before I criticize a man, I like to walk a mile in his shoes. George Deukmejian, Diplomat, The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can't see him laughing. There are three kinds of people: those who can count, and those who cannot. We did our best to bring you only the best ones. Funny One Liner Quotes To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research. Celebrities have given rise to some hilarious and astute bowling quotes in movies and interviews, such as: "This is not 'Nam. Memorable caddy responses to players' comments can only be rolled out with the right golfer otherwise, the caddy/player relationship for the completion of any round may be in serious jeopardy! FREE delivery Wed, Jun 21 on $25 of items shipped by Amazon. One of the worst things you can do on the golf course is lose your cool and bring down the mood of the day. +41. Steven Wright Whopping Funny One Liner quotations If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you. It's round, has three holes, and you put your fingers into it.Ishmael: You leave Rebecca out of this. If you doubt whether bowling is a sport, get it from me, that yes, it is a sport, but for people who have talent to spare. These can lighten the mood and also make great personalization options for fun items like wobbly stress relievers. A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory. If you dont mind, it doesnt matter! "Three strikes and you're out!" My bowling team doesn't like show offs. Finally, they got the ball rolling. One liner tags: attitude, communication, life. Kevin Costner, Actor, If you drink, don't drive. The following is our hand picked collection of 50 of the funniest one line quotes that is sure to leave you in splits. Baseball Puns Basketball Puns Bowling Puns Diving Puns Fishing Puns Football Puns Golf Puns Hockey Puns Running Puns Ski Puns Soccer Puns Swimming Puns Tennis Puns Volleyball Puns. One liner tags: motivational, success, time. SignUpGenius has become a great tool for my dance studio. The following quotes, slogans, and puns address the joy of ones golden years, the worries associated with aging, and the stigmas that affect elderly populations, often with an inspirational or whimsical tone. But it's good to work stuff out sometimes. The bowling team of which I am captain is known lightning. Bowling Hexa Star Trophy | Bowler Award - Silver and Gold - 4.75 Inch Tall - Engraved Plate Upon Request. Get updates on new posts directly to your inbox! "Always borrow money from a pessimist. It all comes down to this roll. "That bad, huh," his friend responded. Chi Chi Rodriquez, PGA Hall of Fame, I never had one thought all week. Sometimes a bowler just has to face the music. If he strikes, he's the 1979 Odor-Eaters Champion. No splits too wide if you got the balls. Jack Lemmon, Actor & Comedian, I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a bunker. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. Now if only I could teach him to play fetch! 50 Funny One Liner Quotes That Will Leave You In Splits! (With Images) Everybody likes to be rewarded for their good work especially in an office setting. bowlers in the alley - Killed the king-pin - Need bowlers to find them in the alley Simple. Petra Hermans, Youth is the gift of nature, but age is a work of art. Stanislaw Jerzy Lec, In the end, its not the years in your life that count. You cannot strike it, if you dont try it. Benefits of Celebrating Cultural Diversity in the Workplace. 81.75 % / 327 votes. Bowling Slogans AGerry Adamsis the call when a golfer has to hit a second tee shot playing a provisional'relating to a former IRA Provisional leader. He won't expect it back.". If he strikes, he's the 1979 Odor-Eaters Champion. Man gives you the award but God gives you the reward. Earl Anthony Quotes. My strategy is simple, knocking them down a pin at a time. Funny Golf Quotes: Sayings, One Liners And More More information Theyve historically represented wisdom, earned through a life filled with experience. Or fastest delivery Tue, Jun 20. email addresses were disqulified from the list and couldn't be sent. Ishmael: Okay, you want to bowl for some big money, eh? Others are more like mini-stories or scenarios, in which case they've simply been broken up in a way that's convenient and easy to read. Five More Minutes - This tongue-in-cheek award goes to the coworker who schedules his or her meetings on the hour even though you know they won't be there until at least five minutes after. See more ideas about bowling quotes, bowling, funny. Bowlers do not make good employees. My lawyer thinks he can get me 5. How do you tell which is the Groom at a Polish wedding? While promotional experts are aware that senior stereotypes are changing, senior citizens continue to serve as experts in their field, as mentors, and as invaluable sources of skills and knowledge. A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponents' luck. Jack Benny, American Comedian, Sex and golf are the only two things you can enjoy if you're not good at either. "Worrying works! If you do bowling and for some reason you cant hear a pin drop, something could be wrong with your bowling. Dont let aging get you down; its too hard to get back up! Tiger Woods, I'm working as hard I can to get my life and my cash to run out at the same time. Like amusic hits chart, I present theTop 10tongue-in-cheek responses to golfer's comments: Golfer:My golf is awful, I think I'm going to drown myself in the lake' Caddy:Think you can keep your head down this long?, Golfer:I'd move heaven and earth tobreak 100on this course Caddy:Try heaven, you've already moved most of the earth', Golfer:You think my game has improved since you saw me last?' She talked too much, made the boat rock constantly, tried to stand up . My knees, my back, my neck, Old people are just young people who have been alive for a very long time, Old age isnt so bad, considering the alternative. We grow old by deserting our ideals. Tequila is a good drink: you drink it and you feel like a cactus; the only problem is that in the morning the thorns grow inward. Caddy:It's very good, but personally I prefer golf, Golfer:Do you think it a sin to play golf on aSunday?' Andrew Perry, Sportswriter, They call it golf because the other four-letter words were taken. Some have a very traditional set-up/punchline style, with the set-up in bold and the punchline written smaller in the space below. AMaradonais when a golfer faces a tricky putt from about 5 feet. Named after the disgraced legendary and diminutive Argentine footballer a nasty little five-footer. The crowd had filled up the venue and everyone was waiting for the bowling alley to open. Do let us know which one was your most favorite quote that made you laugh out loud. It's called an eraser. No matter if you're doing a research or just exploring sayings by famous people. A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking. I don't really do the one-liners and five second bits or whatever. Sorry. The controversialAdolf Hitler sayingis used after a fellow golfer takes two attempts to get out of a sand trap two shots in a bunker'. If I can just die after lunch Tuesday, everything would be perfect. The best holiday for you to go bowling is thanksgiving because you will get turkeys. Meaningful Quotes - Popular Authors - Quote Topics - Picture Quotes. 235 Catchy Bowling Slogans and Taglines Written by Soocial Team in Slogans, Sports Owning a bowling alley is great fun. Always borrow money from a pessimist. Bowlers pay a lot of money to play. This call is based on the song lyric from their most popular song,Living on a Prayer,halfway there!'. His name is Muhammad Alley. That way people will always want to play with you! Short Bowling Quotes. It is not really much about how you bowl, but instead how you roll. Table Of Contents [ show] 1 Bowling Balls An old man boards a bus with bowling balls in each of his front pockets. I think you can Whatcha doin', Mr. Munson? These one-liners and humorous anecdotes look at Bowling Jokes from a variety of perspectives, and try to find humor in wry observations, through irony and sarcasm, and even just by being silly. I think of myself as a theatre comic instead of club comic because I tend to talk for a bit before I start being funny. I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went, then it dawned on me. Spare us the details. View an Example, Give someone on your team a group gift and coordinate with a sign up. Denzel Washington. Famous One Liner Jokes. "I was framed!" Why should a bowling alley be quiet? Tap To Copy. Try some of the following one-liners. In a conversation between one pin and another, one said, Let us never split.. FREE ENGRAVING ON TROPHIES & PLAQUES. These are actual wording samples from real trophies and awards. !, Golfer:That can't be my ball, it's too old'Caddy:It's been a long time since we teed off sir, Golfer:Please stop checking your watch, it's very distracting'Caddy:It's not a watch sir, it's a compass, Golfer:You've got to be the worst caddy in the world'Caddy:I don't think so, that would be too much of a coincidence. Knocking them downone pin at a time. If youre looking for a lighthearted way to appreciate your employees, look no further than these 60 silly superlatives. Funny Bowling Quotes | Funny Bowling Puns | Amsterdam Printing If you shoot 66, they say Man we shot 66 today. Support bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.